My Dear Worrywart
by Aka Wouka
Summary: Splinterwood writes a letter to her protege, Worrywart.      Based on The Screwtape Letters which is based heavily on the Bible, hence the category selection.   Character selection based on the fact that these are two of the Devil's imaginary underlings.


I have never been to this fandom before. Ever. But this is something I did in school a few years ago and I like it. The formatting isn't going the way I want it to, but I've decided I just don't care about certain things pertaining to uploading fanfics. Less stress that way.

Oh, and I'm _totally_ the potbellied old guy who wrote the original piece. *bursts into flames*

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My Dear Worrywart,

I see you have been assigned to the girl Virginia. Why this decision was made by the Lower-Downs I do not know, as this particular individual is not inclined to excessive amounts of worry (which is, obviously, your strong point.) She is, rather, inclined to laziness and forgetfulness—Sloth would have been a better choice, or Olvidar, or even Indulgence. _I_ would have assigned you to her brother, Thomas—he is always worrying over nothing. _He_ would have been a much more suitable subject for you to harass.

Still, there's no use crying over spilled milk (unless, in the case of a human, you want them to hold to a grudge. But that is a subject for another letter.) We shall simply have to treat this as a trial by which you will have to prove that you have abilities besides the capacity to induce worry in your victims.

Speaking of which, let's make one thing very clear: this is not at all like your previous assignment, in which you were required to possess an object. It is a far more delicate operation that requires skill and craftiness and all the other things you have learned thus far in your (woefully inadequate) training. Furthermore, you have a great deal more to learn if you ever wish to succeed as a successful tempter. You cannot simply emerge from a wooden box and frighten your subject into submission by the sight of your presence. Those crude methods might work in Africa, but it is not the way things are done here. Here, you must use tactics that are far more subtle.

For instance; when a boy passes by, or when he talks to your subject, or when she thinks of boys in general, slip into her mind thoughts of how nice they look, and how good they smell, and how much she wishes that one of the lunkheaded fools would treat her the way the gentlemen in those romance novels she is so fond of treat their women. If you can then get her to become used to these thoughts, it will be a simple matter to have her progress to the kind of thoughts that would make her mother blush for shame if she knew of them. Even if she realizes that something is wrong with the way she is thinking, it will not be easy for her to completely eradicate this particular kind of thought from her mind. You see, once a human gets into the habit of doing or thinking something, it is very hard for them to change their ways. The firmest of resolutions and the best of intentions cannot easily change the pattern that has become ingrained in their lives. Of course, the Enemy has the power to break these patterns, if the humans He has created will only cry out to Him. This is a large stumbling block for us, as once _He_ changes a person, that person will generally stay changed. However, we have an advantage. The fact is that these silly creatures are _prideful_. They don't _like_ asking for help. For this reason, a number of the greatest of the Enemy's warriors have some very large handicaps in the way of habitual acting or thinking. Our warriors work night and day to keep them blinded to the fact that they are addicted to the computer, or the television; or that some of their normal thought processes go against everything that the Enemy has written in that vile book of His they call the Bible. I'm sure you've heard of it. It is the only book on earth that actually acts as a _sword_ that can rip the strongest of our kindred spirits asunder and send them screaming to the pit.

Fortunately for us, your subject is not a Christian; so you do not have to worry about such things as 'Divine intervention' or 'the Bible.' Your job must be one of stealth. You must blind your subject to the things of the detestable Light, and slip little thoughts into her mind such as will lead her mind away from the Light and towards the ever looming Darkness. I must caution you, however, that if you try to push her too hard or too hard or too fast, she may realize that what she is thinking is wrong, and cease to do it altogether.

Your affectionate Aunt,

Splinterwood


End file.
